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Intelligence Update: Steven
It has come to our attention that one of our oldest cats Steven, is actually called Lucy. This means that we got both gender and name wrong. The churlish amongst you might ask, “what qualifies you to run a cat review web site when you can’t even get the gender right?”. It’s a fair question, we would say “there aren’t qualifications in reviewing cats, we’re breaking new ground here, we’re living on the edge, there will be casualties. Lucy isn’t a casualty, she’s fine. We might look at her scores again but probably not.
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New Contender: Lucy
Name : Steven Lucy (Identity confirmed) Agility – 6/10 We’ve seen him sit on a wall once or twice but that’s really as good as it gets with Steven Lucy. Health & Vitality – 2/10 Nobody is ever going to accuse Steven Lucy of looking that healthy. He She is better than he she was but frequently looks like he she might die. Home invasion – 2/10 Steven Lucy is never going to be a cat burglar (you see what we did there). He’ll She’ll stop you in the street but is very aware of his her boundaries. Meow – 10/10 Steven Lucy has a brilliant meow. Probably one of the best we’ve come across. Bumping into Steven Lucy is a pleasure because sometimes it seems like he she can talk. He can’t talk but he she tries his her best. Fighting Ability – 2/10 If you’re looking for a cat to have a fight with you want to start with Steven Lucy. He’s She’s rubbish. In mitigation we think he she is probably above all that sort of stuff but the criteria are the criteria. Overall cuteness – 4/10 It’s difficult to say whether or not Steven Lucy is cute. He She looks scrawny and ill but his her eyes demonstrate a fundamental understanding of what it means to be a cat. We’ve given him her a low score anyway because we’re cruel like that. Friendliness – 8/10 Steven Lucy is a genuine cat that wants to be your friend and really likes to listen to what you’ve been up to. Dignity – 2/10 I’m afraid he she just doesn’t have any dignity. He She talks to anyone and always looks a little […]