MeowseleyTurning Cats into Facts

Jan
23rdNew Contender: Towser

Name: Towser (Identity confirmed) Agility – 8/10 Agility is the very bread and butter of being a cat and we think Towser has more than enough to make a sandwich, to pointlessly extend a metaphor. His owner has sadly undersold Towser’s ability at agility, but we can see lashings of potential. Towser is adept at running the length of a fence. There are few sights as satisfying in life as a cheeky cat running along the top of fence, his (or her) tail all over the place, will he (or she) fall? We hope not. Towser can also jump in and out of boxes. Many people would discount this sort of activity as some sort of modern cat fad, we don’t, we can’t think of many things that make us chuckle more than a cat leaping into a box (especially if it is too small). Health & Vitality – 6/10 We know he’s healthy, we can see he is quite shiny. These are all good things, but we also know he is prone to bringing his dinner back. This isn’t an act of selfless devotion to his owner. It’s unthinking greediness or an underlying bowel condition. We’re going to be coming down hard on this in the coming year. Home invasion – 2/10 There doesn’t seem to be anything to substantiate any latent invasion ability. He once threw up on a neightbours doorstep, whilst amusing this is a rubbish example of breaking in. Invasion is about stealth and subtelty, projecting […]